Oui AUGUST 1979 - by Scott Cohen


Who says there's nothing intellectual about Openers? In an apparent attempt to kill their reputation as a thinking man's New Wave band, the Talking Heads agreed to the following interview with reporter Scott Cohen. We switch you now to the group's loft in Long Island City:

Oui: Who was the first pop star you wanted to fuck?

Tina: Not Elvis. I was too young then to be boy crazy. When I started to get boy crazy The Beatles came out but I thought they were prickless. I guess Mick Jagger was the first, but I would want to fuck Marianne Faithful just as much.

Which Talking Head has the biggest microphone?

Jerry: My microphone is about eight inches long and two inches wide. Everyone in the band is about the same size.

What kind of girls do the Talking Heads attract?

Chris: Nice girls. Most of the girls who seem to get next to us are not the kind of girls that chase bands - not that we have anything against girls who do.

What kind of men do you attract?

Tina: If a guy's a big tit man, I'm not going to attract him at all. But if he's a leg man, yes. If it's a girl who looks like an eleven-year-old boy, then that's the kind I'm going to attract. Guys who are into girls who are tomboys grown up.

Do you wish your tits were bigger?

Tina: No, I think my tits are perfect, by themselves. I don't wish they were bigger. I wish one was exactly the same size as the other. They usually aren't. I wish they both were the same size as my big one.

Were you ever afraid they wouldn't get bigger?

Tina: When I was eighteen. I thought I was finished. At first they were so firm that they stayed hard and they were very high. Now that I'm older, they have weight and they're not to hard. Now that I have a sag, they look wonderful because they still turn up. Now they're more like champagne glasses. They're not like candy kisses, which I like, but mine are much rounder. But when I put my face in it, it ruins it all. I think I look like a female Iggy Pop.

Which part of your body do you know the least?

Tina: I never knew how my genitals were attached to my uterus. I guess that's the part I know the least.

While you're performing, do you feel guys in the audience are undressing you?

Tina: I'm sure some men do. It's the same as in everyday life. Last night I wore plastic pants to a party. They are not the kind of pants that you can wear out. They are vinyl jeans, cut like French jeans, and see-through. So I wore very beautiful lace-satin bikini underwear underneath. I tried several different ways. What I settled on was the most attractive thing you could wear underneath normal clothes. So you could see the money through the pockets.

Dues your period ever affect your performance?

Tina: Everybody has good days and bad days and sometimes I have good days when I'm having my period and sometimes I have had bad days when I'm not.

Can a Talking Head get laid on any given night?

Chris: Believe it or not, there are some nights when we can't, but more often we can. There are some towns where the local female population isn't tuned into how hip and groovy the Talking Heads really are.

Tina: I could, more than anybody except for Jerry. But I don't know how well laid I'd get. A lot of the boys who like me are very, very young. Maybe I'd get really well laid.

At the Talking Heads get better, do you get laid more?

David: About twenty-five percent more.

Which Talking Head is the biggest head?

Chris: I guess I am, on a regular basis.

As the Talking Heads got better, did you get higher?

Chris: Yes, but basically their seems to be something inadequate about drugs in that they're so temporary. I wish they were better, longer lasting and more beneficial in a permanent way.

Do the Talking Heads pay more or less for their drugs?

Chris: Some people will give you a deal and some people will take advantage of you. They don't exactly burn you, they cut you.

What is the price of fame?

Tina: It's wrapped up in the amount of sex you get. As you get more famous you have to be more discreet.

What do you call a penis on the first date?

Tina: In our family, we called it the chin-chin. That's why we always giggled when they said, " the hair of your chinny-chin-chin." The first time I saw an erect penis, I thought it looked like a rocket ship. I thought penis was the proper word because it was medical, but I always felt funny about saying it.

What do you call it now?

Tina: Cock. I like cock. I don't like prick or dick. I think cock sounds very proud. For a girl, I like pussy. That's very sweet! I also like fur pie. I don't really like crack or gash, which are more derogatory than cunt. It doesn't sound like sex, it sounds like violence.